I’ve got post-Inchloss blues. There’s nothing much in life which makes me down (other than real issues like world poverty, aids, ebola, famine and the loathsome greed of some individuals) but today I feel ever so slightly at a loose end.

I’m talking about our Inchloss Programmes. Basically, anyone who wants to lose some body fat signs up, pays some dosh and for three weeks they will follow a pure eating plan, train with other like-minded people and generally get down and dirty with me and a team of trainers. At the end of the three weeks, some continue to train with us, others leave the nest to gloat over their new much looser waistbands and (hopefully) to tell all their friends where they got their new bodies from.

So, sister, what’s yer problem? Why the long face? Well, one of the most rewarding things in life must be to raise, nurture and educate towards success. My children have done that and no longer need me (“Muuuuum, my petrol tank is empty…” …”You know that lovely face cream you bought…”…”Do you need that bottle of fizz in the fridge, only I’ve got the girls round for pre-drinks…”) and so my replacement brood to cluck over, stroke, coax and sometimes bark at are groups of gorgeous men and women who come for hard training (regular Inchloss) or ever so slightly gentler training (beginner’s inch loss) and to be told that bread, beer and the aforementioned fizz are off the menu.

Group activities are better, let’s face it. Doing stuff with a bunch of mates undoubtedly increases the fun factor. But what about if it’s hard training, something unpleasant where niceties are whipped out from under you? Isn’t that better done on your own so you don’t have the pressure of anyone else’s failure or success to match against your own?

I don’t think so. From the surveys they fill in, the group format works. Knowing that everyone else is doing it, not just you. Knowing that the whole group are going to be doing squat jumps for 20 seconds and that their grunts and groans will somehow keep you afloat, makes you feel better. That someone else is also going to be facing an evening on mineral water whilst friends imbibe is comforting. The group becomes cohesive, recipes are swapped, pats on backs are dished out and their team spirit soars as fast as the inches drop off.

At the end of the three weeks the job is done, they’re as smug as hell and ‘new body’ is ticked off the to-do list. If you want some of that, our next Programmes start 10th January 2015. With a rather attractive discount. To find out more make sure you get on the mailing list (contact us to bagsy a place) or keep an eye on Facebook and Twitter over the next week.